Dedicated design student chooses Cloud.typography subscription over visiting dying Grandma

February 24, 2016

EXCLUSIVE: This afternoon The Passable Designer was leaked audio from a voicemail left by graphic design student Laura Mellmore for her hospitalised grandmother, explaining her absence from the dying women’s bedside and the reality of where her priorities lay. Full transcript below:

Dear Nana,

How is hospital? Mum told me the doctor’s say you’re inoperable. Ugh, sucks really bad, right? Anyway I just wanted to let you know I’ll be staying in LA rather than returning home to see you.

So for a bit of background, there’s this type foundry (that means they design fonts for your computer) called Hoefler&Co, and honestly they just make, like, the nicest typefaces. You’ve seen the GQ logo, right? Well that was them. They made that. I know, it’s pretty cool.

Then in like 2013 or something they released this thing called Cloud.typography, which is a web font service that delivers the fonts you want to use for your website. I’m pretty sure it has over 900 fonts on it. Nine. Hundred. Oh, and it’s also got this feature called ScreenSmart, which means the font is equipped with a set of detailed instructions called hints that make the fonts themselves adapt to pixel grids at different point sizes. That’s so cool, right? Even you’d have to admit that.

And it’s weird, because, like, the other day I was thinking of how when Dad left and you took Mum and all of us kids in, feeding us, giving us a warm bed, putting a roof over our heads so we weren’t on the street, and this magazine I was reading was using one of the Cloud.typography fonts called Sentinel, and like, it’s just such a coincidence. But you just have to see this font, Nana, it was designed to perform in ways that so many slab-serifs had failed to do before. Contrasting thick and thins, it’s so fresh and just so… charismatic. Honestly I just love it so much.

What I’m trying to say is that, well, The Cloud.typography subscription I want is $149, which is like so much less than a flight home. I’m a design student, and I’ll be doing this for the next fourty, fifty years; you’re only going to be alive for basically another couple weeks, so from a purely economical point of view it doesn’t make sense for me to come home. You understand, don’t you?

Anyway, have a great weekend Nana. Love you!”

Update: Laura’s grandmother died earlier this afternoon, following a long and uncomfortable battle from her chilly hospital bed. will be launching next week, partnering Requiem and Mercury for a classy, sophisticated style.

Sadly posted on February 24, 2016 by Zander Brade

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